ADHD – Positive, Yet Cynical

Dealing with the Mental ‘Slump’

A little expressive piece on facing a mental downer spiral.

So, let’s talk about when things get a bit heavy and your body and mental energy goes into that little slump pit. We’ve all been there, right? Well, this is where I am at as I write this.

I’d been doing pretty well, having a lot of fun engagements with people, a seemingly never-ending list of TBR’s and ARC’s to focus my mind on, and as always my brain is overwhelmed with so many imaginative story ideas.

But then a few things happened that knocked me back to the floor, you know what I mean, when loads of things happen at once? Negative situations always happen and we ride through, but when they all seem to come at the same time it’s very overwhelming.

I’d reached a bit of a blank spot with one of the novel pieces I’m working on, I was beating myself up that I am never going to be good enough as a writer, so that’s never a good mentality to be riding with. Then I got stuck down with a head cold, which ruined multiple evenings where I couldn’t do anything because all my body was forcing me to do was sleep, then I tried to reconnect with someone I thought cared about me and got ghosted. Ghosting is always a brutal and horrible experience, and that just made me sad and my slump pit deepened.

I hadn’t read anything in days, and when I go out and I’m surrounded by other people I’m fine and can engage and act normal, but as soon as I’m home everything hits me again, and it’s the super low moods that keep kicking at me.

So how do I overcome it? Or find a way to work through it? Well, multiple things really.

Some of these things inspired me to write poetry again. I do have a little side poetry project I’m working on, but I’m not ready to share all of what that’s about yet. But I look at the moments where I manage to write a poem on something even if that’s the only thing I do that day, it’s a plus. (I wrote a poem called ‘The Ghost’ which I am actually really f-ing proud of by the way)!

I have also been learning a lot about manifestations and how we mirror what we’re feeling in our everyday life experiences etc, now, a lot of people get very judgy on things like law of assumption and manifesting so I won’t go into all that, but I’ve started trying things like scripting where I write out the things I want in my life in a more positive way, with the mental impression that at some point those things will materialise, like if I write about great feedback on a book I write or how happy I am that my poetry book kicks off among other things then maybe it’ll gradually become something real. I guess watch this space on how that turns out!

I am also starting to practice Gratitude. I got a gratitude journal a couple of weeks back that I’m filling in every day, but I’m now starting to take it a bit more seriously. I’ve also read about the idea of every morning when you wake up, write out 10 things you feel blessed to have and why, and practice doing that for 28 consecutive days.

So I am giving this a go. Now, anyone who knows me well enough knows that regular routine is a struggle for me. I always dive into a certain kind of new routine or practice, and by week 2 or 3 I have ended up forgetting or giving up. So this is a new big thing for me to try and do.. 28 days is a lot. I’ve done 2 days worth so far and it really does get your brain into thinking properly about all the little things you don’t think about day to day that you should be grateful for.

I’m intrigued to see how it plays out, as 10 things a day does seem like it’ll be pretty tough once you get to day 4 onwards. But I am going to try it. And hope this will also somehow help my brain to rewire and get me out of this damn mental slump.

The point is, I’m still here, I’m still trying. It’s just universe be testing me right now. Yet I truly believe I will get there, and you’ll see a lot more from me yet 😉

Until next time.

An 8 Day Social Media Detox

A little reflection on my social media break

In July, I made a decision that due to extreme over-stimulation, I was going to spend my holiday completely off of all social media app’s, including Whatsapp.

It may sound like a bizarre decision to make but it was something I thought I really needed to focus on. The last few months have been a complete whirlwind for me, I’m still struggling with certain things but I’ve been extremely active regularly on my social media pages with my reading updates and writing (even though, I struggle a lot with the latter lately).

It was brought to my attention that I was overstimulated, working 40(+) hours a week and then trying to keep up to date with being relevant online plus organising your own living space, trying to find the time to write anything etc. my phone was stitched to my hand pretty much. And I was doing that annoying thing I think most of us do with our phones – the looking at an app, coming out of it, only to jump back in 2 seconds later (honestly, what do we think is new at that point?).

My detox was from the Friday evening, right through to the following Saturday evening. I put screen limits on my phone so that all my apps were not accessible while I was away. As I was going on a family holiday I had to leave texts/calls open but other than that I restricted everything.

The initial goal I had was: have time away from the apps, use it to clear my head, spend some free time writing and doing some self-development work.

One of the bizarre things I felt when I started this was guilt. As someone who struggles a lot with anxiety, I can be the first to understand how much silence from another person can trigger someone. However, I am a bit on the fence with some areas of this, I think as a human race, we have become very dependent on immediacy, especially from others. We need to learn to slow down (I know, I am not one to talk on this) and also appreciate that not everyone is available 24/7. No-one should be.

I did respect others in my decision though by sending messages to the people I am likely to hear from to advise them I would be off grid for just over a week. So nobody panics. So once that good deed was done, I shut it all off and went ahead with my plan.

Did it all go to plan? Almost.

I did manage to go the whole time without opening any of the app’s. It was hard at first, but I never caved. The things that didn’t go to plan was the other bits. Turns out, when you’re holidaying with family and having to share a room with a younger family member, your personal plans and requirements go out the window a little bit.

It was also a difficult process because I also decided to quit vaping cold turkey at the same time (a separate post on nicotine withdrawal to come later), and still coming to terms with my thyroid medication being a bit all over the place and the nonstop heat. So there were times I could have done with distracting myself on social media, but I still was determined and didn’t cave 🙂

(I would also like to randomly push in here that in case you weren’t aware… you can get sunburn on your feet. It’s not comfortable. Cream up).

But all my little obstacles and dilemmas aside, here are the positive things I have taken away from my detox:

A change of plan with some writing – Although I got zero writing done due to distractions, I did have a lot of time to think about why I was struggling a bit with my novel I’m trying to write. It occurred to me that there was an underlying issue with my general idea, so I am now taking it on from a whole new plot point, but I feel more confident about where this one is going now. It also gave me time to come up with some other novel draft ideas. (Yes, this does mean I am starting my novel again a little bit. But I am still going with the wing it plan and am hoping to get a massive chunk of it done by September).

I had fresher ideas and perspectives without social media influence – I cannot begin to tell you how much clearer my brain felt after being completely ignorant to social media for a while. There was no algorithm suggestions making me rethink things or influencing my ideas. I just had time to adjust to and think the way I wanted to.

I now know that although it’s a necessity these days, I don’t have to be on it all the time – Spoiler alert – the detox and not using apps for a week did not kill me. I didn’t miss anything life threatening or critical. The world carried on without me, and I caught up in my own time. I think this is an important factor for me to focus on, especially now that I’m back online and trying to regularly post again.

Yes, it’s good to stay in the know and updated on everyone and everything, but we let FOMO hit us way too much I think. After doing this detox, I am now trying to be a bit more disciplined with my usage… I have screen time locks at night now, I put it on dnd whenever I am out or about to work or do something that needs my attention, I turned my notifications off – so I only go into the apps when I want to.

I am hoping I can stick to these routines now (it would really help my writing motivation if I could) but I am not only proud of myself for managing that whole time without it, but I’m confident that I am another big step closer to not letting my anxiety overcome me when it comes to phones and communication, and maybe I will be able to achieve my 2026 goals after all?

Finding myself as a Writer with ADHD.

This year I set myself the goal of really focusing on my writing more and getting myself into a position where my novel draft (or drafts) are done and I am in a position to publish some poetry in 2027 as well as start being in an editing/publishing mindset that year for my novel(s).

Ambitious, right? It especially is when you have ADHD. I thought I’d write a little post (because you know, that’s how I express myself) about the different things I have learned in my writing stages while also tackling my extremely overactive hyper brain!

ADHD is a blessing when it comes to writing, having an overactive mind can be amazing because I am full of ideas every single day. The trick is, to plan it out constructively and not overwhelm myself with too many ideas at once.

How do I do this? Well, instead of giving up on novel 1 and diverting to something different every other day. I started a ‘writing jar’. When I have an idea for a plot or a story, I jot it down on a piece of paper and put it in the jar. That way I won’t forget the story idea (because my brain be forgetful) but I’m not losing focus on what I want to currently work on.

There’s a lot of good classes and workshops out there to progress in writing. But they’re not all for me.

One common issue with ADHD, is the impulsiveness we’re pre-wired with. It’s easy to see something advertised and jump on it (much to my bank balances dismay). Trying to get myself into a good position as a writer, means I found myself very easily attracted to any kind of advice book or workshop that involved writing. However, every writer and their writing style is different.

As an example, one thing I have learned for me personally.. all-day online workshops are not for me. It’s nothing against those workshops, it’s a me thing. If I attend a day workshop in person I’m fine. There’s just something about being online watching something for a consecutive number of hours sitting in my flat alone, I find myself too distracted and I can’t engage. I’m not going to beat myself up about it. It’s a learning curve and I now know that sticking to certain workshops that are a maximum of 2.5-3 hours an evening are the one’s I can stick with.

I also found myself diving in to too many various types of writing courses. Truthfully, I am fascinated by a wide variety of genres, I read pretty much anything. I’d love to be able to write novels that are not always exactly the same type of trope or genre. But what I have had to learn is, focus on one at a time. The novel I am working on currently is enough, any other ideas can go into the jar for now.

Also, as cheesy as it sounds.. if something is meant to be, it’ll find me at the right time. I shouldn’t push myself to do more beforehand.

The most difficult thing I find with ADHD and trying to write, is I am hyper-fixated on ideas and plots every day when I am not at my desk or with a notepad in hand. When it comes to the times I want to write it all out, my brain is fried and the motivation seems to have dug its own coffin deep underground. How I try to navigate around this? I have started doing things in ‘small doses’ rather than pushing myself to do large chunks, I’ll give myself small timeframes to just work on something. Whether it is jotting down a poem, working on my novel draft or general writing my feelings in a prose piece, I set small time schedules e.g. 30 minutes a night. Then, if I manage to feel inspired to do longer, fabulous. If I don’t, at least that’s half hour done on something. It’s better than nothing after all.

Now to my next point. And probably most importantly, the biggest struggle with ADHD is a lovely little side condition called RSD (rejection sensitivity dysphoria). I struggle with this in general day to day life, but with writing it is ten times harder. I might still be working on novel writing, but my blog posts and poetry pieces are shared on social media often. Whether it’s algorithms playing up a bit so people aren’t engaging enough, or people don’t like what I’m sharing (which is allowed, we all have opinions), I overwhelm myself too much with the lack of likes or engagements that my posts get.

I try hard not to, and as part of trying to change my mindset into a more positive one (like my writing, it’s a work in progress), I am trying not to use the number of likes (or lack of) as an indication of who I am as a writer. I need to remember why I am writing and how much I have progressed as a writer in recent times. This should be my mindset, not upset myself over thinking that social media is an indication of what my talents are.

Like with everything I write and do. It is all a learning curve, a work in progress. I’m hoping that this post makes a bit of sense – it is another typical Zoë waffling random rubbish thing so apologies if it’s all just a mess and doesn’t really give any good answers.

Just remember that having ADHD (or any condition that might make you work a bit differently for that matter) isn’t always a curse.

Everyone works in their own ways and own pace, there’s no right or wrong way to proceed.